I have been racking my brain for a topic to blog about for weeks now, suddenly at twelve o’clock last night in bed after having been editing my third novel, an idea hit me like lightning – I am turning 30. Yes the big dreaded three zero. (Eyes pop open). I have known it was coming but in the dark of last night I knew with certainty it was coming up fast and before I know it, all that it entails (dramatic music - dunt, dun,dunnn...)

Apparently (here I will attempt to use eight years of acquired natural health knowledge) your metabolism slows. This is bummer no.1 on my list because it is hard enough to avoid sugar and keep weight off when you are estrogen dominant and have had a child and German heritage. No 2. My fertility is now going to rapidly decline until the age of 34 when it plummets into the abyss and dreams of ever one day having a sister/brother for my only child become a very slim possibility. No.3 I will never be able to have a student work visa and go overseas to live in a hostel and have drunken romances with international boys. Yes that fantasy has died a slow death. But don’t be sad for me, I do hear thirty is the new 20. Truth is all you people over 30 are rolling your eyes right now and those in their twenties or teens are reading on in pity. But the real truth of the matter is I am happy, - good bye uncertainty, immaturity and turmoil. Hello unexpected random chin hairs (okay that part not so much) and stability. By now I know who I am, I haven’t been overseas but I have had a situation or two and experience or ten. I've come out more confident and knowing who I am – that’s what the painful early years are for, and boy where they hard at times. 

I was fast to develop physically and that somehow meant I was slow to develop emotionally. Not a good combo for a confused kid. Add in, that it took me until I was 27 to realize I was an introvert, so finally I could stop wondering what exactly was wrong with me, because no one in my life had a clue - this resulted in depression and that resulted in more misunderstanding and feeling more alone and isolated. Happy times. But I pushed on. I say this because even though I wasn't the life of the party (sometimes quite the opposite) that doesn't mean I wasn't great in my own way. ‘Accept the things you cannot change and change the things you cannot accept’, should probably be changed to ‘Accept the things you cannot change and accept the things you cannot accept’. ‘Work with what you've got’ might be a better analogy.

I am actually glad to leave all that early years shit in the dust and am looking forward to the future with optimism because for me it’s all up from here, because I've been around the block and I know a thing or two. Don’t get me wrong I still want to learn much more, much, much more. So thirty, I welcome you and all the wonderful things the next ten wonderful years will bring. I will use all the awkward and embarrassing torment of the first thirty to inspire and develop in the next decade, come what may. I will follow my own path - and dear god I am so happy to be thirty! And though maybe I didn't always communicate with people so well now I have the medium of written words to speak to readers and touch a part of their heart and that is more beautiful than anything. And when I go overseas I will be staying in nice comfy hotels and I will remember and appreciate it all the more – plus did I mention I would be comfy? – Truth is that suits me better anyway, I always did things a little backwards. The death of one dream is the beginning of a new one.

Stay tuned for my next post in exactly one decade when I will be turning forty.

Love 

~Tina Smith

An introvert, dog lover, Pisces, Herbalist, Massage therapist, Iridologist and student Naturopath. Author of Wolf Sirens Forbidden and the sequel Wolf Sirens Fever. My favorite color is turquoise and I possibly couldn't live without water and lip-balm. I learnt to shoot for Wolf Sirens. I enjoy yoga, soaping, alone time, reading and am obsessed with writing -I have surprised quite a few people with my secret hobby. No one in my family writes. I make a mean potato salad. I adore strong female protagonist's which is what stirred me to write Wolf Sirens. I drive like I'm in a rush always, I never clean my car and I will admit to a shame full love of reality T.V. Gypsy weddings and 16 and pregnant are some guilty pleasures. My stories are a beautiful and tortured mix of reality meets fantasy. I was born in the green Bega Valley, New South Wales. I now reside in Adelaide South Australia with my daughter and our cocker cross, Billey.

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